Thursday, November 29, 2007

An Open Letter to the Rude People I've Crossed Paths With While Minding My Own Business

I felt it was time for another open letter. So here it is...

Dear Rude People I've Crossed Paths With While Minding My Own Business:

I'm not quite sure how or why, but it seems that I have somehow offended your delicate sensibilities and as a result, you've felt it's necessary to be crochety, rude and miserable.

Like you - person who was shoving me from behind in order to get onto the subway faster - I'm sorry if I wasn't moving quickly enough for you. Maybe you didn't see the hoards of people who were actually trying to get off the subway (which is why I was quietly waiting to one side of the subway doors. I know... how incredibly annoying of me).

Or, to Mrs. I'm-going-to-butt-in-line-and-then-push-this-girl-around-while-she's-trying-to-pay-for-subway-tokens. I wonder if you've ever read an article by Ms. Manners? I'm sure Ms. Manners would say that all nice people should wait their turn in line, rather than pushing and shoving innocent people who have waited a long time for their turn and just want to pay and move on with their day.

Finally, to you - the visibly agitated man who was upset with me for having the audacity to walk in front of his path on a busy street: please accept my apology. It was very wrong of me to get in your way and ruin your entire day. I see it made you very, very angry. How awful of me.

I know that this letter may be in vain, because you probably think your rudeness is justified, however; I just want you to know that it's really not that difficult to be pleasant. Try smiling a little each day. And relaxing. And try not to sweat the small stuff. It may surprise you.

And it will certainly make me (and everyone else around you, I'm sure) a whole lot happier.

Best of luck,

H.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Dining out

Last night I went out for dinner with two friends I haven't seen in a while. I really, really love being around said girls. So they made the night fabulous - despite the lack of food.

Here's what I mean by "lack of food"...

We went for sushi. I love sushi. Love it to death. But I've been ruined by the REALLY good all you can eat sushi places in Toronto. I don't mean the gross, "been sitting on a counter under a sneeze shield all night" type of all you can eat. This sushi is fresh. And made for you as soon as you order it. And it's as endless as you want it.

So, last night, when we went to a very "Toronto" sushi restaurant (where everything is white and stark with 'clean lines' and the waiters wear all black and you get dirty looks if you don't order a saketini or whatever it's called). Anyway, so at this very posh restaurant, I ordered a miso soup, 2 pieces of nigiri (a piece of salmon on some rice) and one roll. Oh, and one of those saketini's (I was peer pressured). My dinner was $56.

Or... roughly the price that two people can dine for at an all you can eat sushi place. And I left a little hungry.

Needless to say, I wasn't overly impressed. But, that's just the suburbanite in me.

At least the company was great.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

These are the Days of our Lives

So today is another day. It seems my mind is still in vacation mode, because I woke up several times last night VERY confused as to what day it was exactly. While I was in the shower, shaking out the mental cobwebs, I had to seriously think hard about what day it is today.

At first, I was sure it was Friday. It's not. Boo. However, I was incredibly stressed because I was thinking about the doctor appointment I have to go to on Friday morning to get blood taken, which means I have to fast the night before after 7pm. (And I didn't last night. Mmm... food).

Anyway, then I thought to myself (at 4am, mind you) "Oh phew... I'm safe. It's only Thursday today." And happily went back to sleep.

Ah well. I now realize that it's Tuesday today (or so they tell me on Breakfast Television this morning). Not my favourite day of the week... but hey - I'm still coming out of my happy-go-lucky vacation mood. So, happy Tuesday everyone!

Monday, November 26, 2007

I'm back, baby

So I was on hiatus for a week... which is why there was a lack of witty blog entries. But never fear, dear readers, I'm back from my week of drinking, eating, shopping, sleeping and general merriment with my dear hubby.

Having a break from work (even though I enjoy my job and wasn't stressed) makes you feel like a million bucks, doesn't it? Around mid-week, I completely forgot what day it was... which is a lovely, lovely feeling.

And whilst I was eating rich foods and drinking beer, I completely forgot about work, the errands I have to run, keeping the house clean, the upcoming Christmas shopping. Everything was gone.

Now I'm feeling refreshed and ready for the week ahead. Even the rainy, gloomy weather isn't bugging me.

Vacations. What a fabulous, fabulous concept. I urge you to go ahead and take one soon, too.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Man weds dog

Apparently, a man in southern India married a female dog in a traditional Hindu ceremony in order to atone for his sin of stoning two dogs to death.

How much clearer can it be that our world is seriously f#$d up!?

First of all - to the man who married the dog, there is no, I repeat, NO atonement for stoning two dogs to death. That's just sick. I can't even bring myself to think about it... it's so cruel.

Secondly - listen buddy, bestiality is never the answer. Making a bitch your wife may seem like a good way to make up for your past indiscretions... but, I stand by the statement that I made after I heard Harry Potter had a fling with a horse in Equus, and that is - it's NEVER okay to get with an animal!

I'm saying a little prayer for the future of our world today.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Rise and shine

Last night I spent my evening working late. At about 10pm, I started getting antsy. I was fretting over the fact that if I didn't go to bed within an hour, I knew that I would feel off for the entire day today.

I'm a morning person. I can get up at 5:30 and get my day started with an envigorating workout, no problem. I enjoy the peace and quiet of the house as I make my breakfast, check out the weather report on Breakfast Television and slowly get ready for the day. I actually like the mornings.

Evenings are another story. I have a joke with a couple of co-workers that once 4pm hits, I get stupid. 4pm is "stupid o'clock". And it's because I do my best thinking in the morning. That's when I'm the freshest. So, by evening - I just want to relax on the couch, watching mindless TV before I fall asleep.

This working late thing is just not conducive to my style. I must tell my boss.

Anyway, I managed to get to bed by 11:30pm - so I slept in today. Starting the morning at 6:30 isn't so bad. But I definitely need my morning latte to get me back on track.

Good morning, everyone!

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Sunrise on the Serengeti

A and I have decided to go on a safari in Africa next year. We're still working out how we'll afford it - but that's just a minor detail. We're in the research phase right now... trying to figure out which tour company to go with, where to go, when, etc. etc.

All I can picture in my mind is riding over dry plains in a little jeep with A by my side as we watch real, live elephants and giraffes roam by. We'll take a drive at sunset and watch the sky light up in bright reds and pinks while we let the warm, dry evening air whip through our hair and dance across our faces.

This is our dream.

And while we're still young and not tied down by much (read: kids), we're ready to take off and enjoy what adventures come our way.

Imagine going to Africa... and having the memory of us being there together, for the rest of our lives.

I can hardly wait.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Cookie

Last night, hubby and I had a craving for cookies. So - we baked some from a recipe in our new cookbook, The Joy of Cooking. It was given to us by A's Mom. It's pretty much a symbol of domesticity, and as such, was viewed essential as a part of our married life.

I have to admit - I had fun being all domestic last night. It may sound boring and old, but A and I had a really good time, standing around in the kitchen, helping each other throw ingredients into the bowl, eating batter and talking excitedly about how good the cookies smell.

It was cold outside, and A and I spent the evening inside in a warm kitchen, in our pj's, drinking tea and eating fresh-baked oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. It was fun and romantic and yummy.

I'd say last night was pretty much as close to perfect as an evening can get.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Winning

Last night I went to an advertising award presentation. Yes, there are awards for the direct marketing ads and DM pieces we create. And I'm happy to say that the company I work for won 2 awards (for the only two pieces we submitted!)

Since joining this company a year and a half ago, I've won a national advertising award for creative, been part of 2 awards last night and look forward to having another award to put my name on next week at the big CMA night (not the Country Music Awards... the Canadian Marketing Association awards).

I know I'm totally patting myself on the back with this post... but I feel good! I'm an award-winning advertising creative. Woo hoo! I'm actually good at what I do!

Okay, that's enough of that. Don't want my head to get too big.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Damn soccer players

Did you know that the general public has a dislike for runners? This was unknown to me until recently.

On Halloween night, my running group had a scheduled run. So, my Mom and I went out for it - only to be met by yells of "Run faster!" and "F'n runners!!" That's right - as we jogged along, minding our own business, someone swore at us.

When we were out one Sunday morning for our run, we were met by honks and people actually imitating us in an attempt to make fun.

Now, I know running isn't for everyone... but this reaction seems pretty pathetic to me. It's like people are actually annoyed with us for wanting to get a little exercise into our day. Like - how dare we do something that has no actual affect on the people around us - but makes us feel good both physically and mentally?

I wonder what the reaction would be if I went into a gym and started hooting and hollering at the gym-goers while in the middle of their workout?

You know - I don't particularly like soccer. What would happen if I stood on the sidelines of a soccer field making fun of the players? I would probably look ridiculous. (Hint, hint to the people who don't like runners).

Just so we're all clear - if you don't like running, that's totally fine. But some people do. And as long as I'm not running all over you, I don't think there's any cause for insult.

That's just my two cents, I'll get down off of my soap box now.

Friday, November 2, 2007

Laughs for a Friday afternoon...

Funny Simpsons quotes:

Bart: [To boarding school rich kid] Drop the bag, Jack.
Rich boy: The name is Jackington. To the Hamptons!

Lou: Chief, there's an armed robbery going on.
Chief Wiggum: What?
Lou: Come on Chief, you know this one.
Chief: Ooohhh... A shooty-stealey!

McBain: Laughing time is over.

Homer: [Drunk] Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.

Lisa: I'm an ugmo.
Homer: Now, that's not true. You're cute as a bug's ear.
Lisa: Fathers have to say that little stuff.
Homer: Dad, am I cute as a bug's ear?
Grandpa: No. You're homely as a mule's butt.
Homer: There. See?

Kent Brockman: Scott, things aren't as happy as they used to be down here at the unemployment office. Joblessness is no longer just for Philosophy majors - useful people are starting to feel the pinch.

Trash talk

Tomorrow night, I'm hosting a party for my brother's 30th birthday. The theme: white trash.

If this offends any of my readers, I apologize to all 5 of you. (Though I don't think any of you are white trash, so I don't see why you would be offended).

Anyway, I'm pretty excited. I'm all ready with the white trash party food: saltines and imitation cheese whiz, little weenies on toothpicks and twinkies.

I can just picture the array of mullet wigs, stained wife beaters and bad eye makeup now.

Crack open a can of Bud everyone and get your best beer t-shirt out of the closet. It's going to be a good time.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

I loves me some free stuff

Yesterday, my brand new, shiny cell phone arrived. It's ever so pretty. And I'm especially proud of it because I got it through the use of some well-worded arguments.

Yes, I argued and complained my way to a FREE phone from Fido. (Dad... are you proud??)

Let me tell you - I had planned out an argument, I had facts to back up my argument, I even had a hypothesis on standby. I was ready to do a battle of words.

But basically all I had to do was tell them that I was a good customer, and I was disappointed that I hadn't received any recognition from them. (Not even a note to say "Hey - thanks, you. You rock." Nothing.) And since I had no contract with them anymore, there was nothing preventing me from taking my phone number, and my business, elsewhere.

I've got to hand it to Fido - at least they were smart enough to realize that I was a good customer worth keeping. I ended up speaking to a nice representative and got a $300 phone for free and a better rate plan. Yay me.

And yay for a world where customers still matter. It's just too bad you have to complain first before you get anywhere.