Friday, April 3, 2009

Yes. I bore a striking resemblance to Bubba.

So. Moving on from yesterday. Despite the weather, I'm actually much more cheerful and happy and lovely today. This blogging thing is pretty cathartic.

And now - with no real segue - A Story About My Lips.

I've always had a very sensitive mouth. My lips, in particular are extremely sensitive. When I get a cold sore, I GET A COLD SORE. It's ugly. It mutates. It threatens to stomp through Tokyo.

When I was a kid, I was swimming around in a wave pool at a water park and the locker key that was attached to my wrist swung up and hit me on the lips. It wasn't overly painful or anything (it was just a little key, after all) and I only got a teensy, tiny little cut. But the next day, my lips swelled up to the size of melons.

And when I go anywhere sunny for a prolonged period of time - I have to use SPF 4,568 on the kisser, or I get ugly fever blisters like you wouldn't believe.

You notice a theme here? Those babies are sensitive.

So, while I was writing my love letter to my week-long vacation in Mexico... I somehow forgot about the lip story.

Seems that SPF 4,568 is no match for the powerful Mexican sun because I somehow managed to burn just my bottom lip. (Just the bottom... I still don't quite understand how that happened). Anyway - so it was red and sore. I put aloe on it. I tried to leave it alone.

The Next Morning (before getting out of bed)...

Me: Honey, I feel funny.
Hubster: What do you mean?
Me: My lips.
Hubster (rolling over): Let me have a loo- OH MY GOD!
Me: What????
Hubster: Your bottom lip is HUGE.
Me: Just the bottom???
Hubster: Yeah... just the bottom one. (Trying very hard not to laugh.) Hon, it's all swollen. And it's almost... comical.
Me (after hustling off to the bathroom to check it out in the mirror): ALMOST comical??? Oh man. It's comical.
Hubster: Let me have a closer look here... (examining lips closely)
Me: "Shrimp gumbo... shrimp cocktail... shrimp stew..."

Unfortunately for you, I didn't get a picture of it, as I was a little too embarrassed. Having one giant lip on your face is weird. But I'll give you a mental image: I looked like a half of a hot dog bun.

Anyway - so a bucket of ice and an hour and a half later, it started going down. By the end of the day, you couldn't tell at all anymore. Phew.

And that... is my lip story.


  1. I had a spider bite on my bottom lip once. It just kept getting bigger and bigger. It kind of freaked me out, actually. I'm disappointed there's no picture of you, though. :-P

  2. hehe, good to see Andrew was so caring!!