Thursday, January 14, 2010

The coundown is on...

Only 3 weeks and 2 days (including today) until I'm done work for a year.


I have no idea what to expect, but there's part of me that thinks I'm really going to like being home.

Don't get me wrong - I enjoy my job. I like being a part of the adult world. I get to be creative every day, and have fun, and write for a living. Who could ask for anything more, really? It's pretty awesome.

But, on the other hand, it's not home. Home sweet home. In my comfy clothes. Surrounded by my stuff. My comforts.

Then again - I have some small, little doubts floating about in my mind about who I'll become when left at home. Let me explain.

Over the Christmas holidays, I usually have a week to a week and a half off for vacation. By the end of the week and a half, I've most often fallen into a trap of pure and utter laziness. I don't shower until 5pm each day, if at all. I stay in my pjs. I barely wash my face, let alone put on makeup and go out and face the day. I enter sloth-mode. And all of this happens, without me having a little baby to take care of.

So when it comes time for vacation to end and for me to go back to work, I'm usually not that bummed about it. I get back on schedule. I get up daily and shower. I get back into regular exercise. I enjoy the little things - like a morning latte each day.

Which is what leads me to my doubts. I can't seem to avoid the "I no longer care about my appearance nor cleanliness in general" phase I go through when at home for long periods of time. I fall out of any sort of routine and get slobbish. So, there's no doubt this is going to happen to me again, while at home with a baby to look after as well.

Will I like the new me? Will I be able to get into some kind of routine, just so I feel like a human? Will Andrew wonder what's happened to the cute wife he married? Worst of all - - - WILL I START WEARING MOM JEANS??

(If you see me in pleated jeans with a 9-inch zipper, I give you FULL permission to berate me. Please.)

Who knows if I'm going to take to every aspect of this Mom role. I have some small doubts. I just don't know what to expect at all right now.

However, I have a feeling that when I meet Wee Baby Girl for the first time, I'll probably forget about every little, minor thing I just wrote about.

(Except the Mom jeans. That rule still stands.)

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