Monday, March 22, 2010

The weekly update

I hope to do this blogging thing more often.

It'll happen...

I think.

Anyway, this just in from the world of Anna - She's cute! (As if you needed me to give you that update. We all know that, now don't we?)

Anna's napping right now. She's pretty sleepy today. As is her Mama. Anna napped when I took her for a walk to Shopper's. She napped when we got home. We napped together for an hour. And she fell promptly asleep after eating lunch. That's a sleepy baby!

She appears to be stirring right now. So I better make this quick...

Anna makes these crazy grunting noises when she's waking up. She actually makes them in her sleep, too. When she was first born and we brought her home, I was pretty worried that something was wrong. I thought she maybe had bad gas, I thought she couldn't breathe properly. Then I discovered (after asking my midwife) that the grunting noise was just something babies do.

I felt sorta dumb for asking. But there you go. Welcome to Motherhood.

I don't know anything about this little human being. So I'm constantly questioning my decisions and worrying about her development. Every little sound, every little habit she gets into... I'm always wondering if I'm doing it right. (I've heard this never goes away. Like... ever.)

I worry if she's sleeping enough (I'm not worrying about that today, of course). I worry if she's eating enough. I worry about if I'm talking to her or holding her enough. I worry about whether she's being intellectually stimulated enough. I worry about whether my milk is tainted with spicy foods or too much caffeine.

In short - I'm a bit neurotic.

But I feel like I have to be. She's relying on me. She can't do anything for herself yet. (Except for stretch. Which? Baby stretches are the CUTEST stretches in the world, I have to say).

She needs me so much right now. She needs to be held and loved and sung to and smiled at. She needs someone to tell her how beautiful she is. She needs to hear "Mommy's here" when she's sad. She needs lots of food. And warm arms to sleep in.

She needs me.

And I've discovered...

I really need her, too.

7 comments:

  1. I think the worry is one part of motherhood we're never prepared for. And unfortunately it never goes away. The worries just change as the kids get older.

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  2. Dawn's right. Motherhood = Worry. Never, ever goes away. Just ask your Mom. She still worries about you. It just can't be helped.

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  3. Lovely post... you have such good instincts. Makes me mooshy, and weepy. Anna is a lucky little girl and you're a lucky mama!

    And yes, I'll worry about you forever, but not Anna because she has you :)

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  4. Oh the joys of first time motherhood. Nobody ever prepares you for that! You worry so much about the first one and then the second one comes along and you don't worry quite so much - after all the first one is still alive and well, right? Then they get older and all the worries about whether you did it right or not come flooding back! The joys! But don't worry, they always turn out perfect.

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  5. little anna is a real cutie!

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  6. I, like your Mom, felt all mooshy and verklempt! love your blogs, your writing skills and your subject! Your little bundle of joy and, worry and joy, and guilt, and joy are truly a topic worth writing about and reading about! Keep up the good work!

    Aunt S. {:~>)))

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  7. Heather - you nailed it. That was so incredibly beautiful. Thanks for sharing!

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