Confessions

A while back, I had "Confession Fridays". It didn't really catch on. I guess I didn't feel like airing my dirty laundry in blogger-land every single Friday for all of my dear readers to point and judge and look disapprovingly at their computer screens/indirectly at me.

But - I'm over that now.

Time for "Confession Friday" again!

My confessions for today are as follows:

• I have been fully sucked in by the belief that creams and ointments will get rid of my stretch marks. And thusly, I slather myself with some kind of body butter and, more recently, a sticky Vitamin E oil every morning, in hopes that the horrid red stretchies on my hips will go away.
• I have been consumed by all things baby. I'm reading a giant baby book. I blather on about my pregnancy on Facebook and here in my blog. I'm already losing my identity as Hez. Now I'm just "pregnant Hez who's about to have a baby". I bet people are secretly tired of listening to me.
• I came into work at 9:30am today. Instead of 8:30am like I usually do. Shhh... don't tell the boss-man.
• Lately, I'm very, very annoyed by almost all of the people who ride the GO train every day. I've uttered the phrase "I hate people" more than once in the past few weeks. (Ugh!!! Who am I becoming??)
• I haven't had my nether region waxed in lord knows how long. I'll just say this: it ain't pretty.
• On that note... I don't care who knows this little tid-bit about me: There is nothing like a completely hair-free butt-hole. You get that bad boy waxed and you're never going back, folks. I promise you. It's one of my ultimate favourite things.
• Now you know I like my butt-hole to be hair-free. Will you ever look at me the same way again? Probably not.

Hmmm... I think that's as fine a place as any to end today's blog.

Yes. A fine place, indeed.

***EDITED TO ADD*** Wait! I just realized I *do* care who knows that last little tid-bit about me. I really, sincerely hope Doris doesn't continue to read my blog and/or come across that piece of info. about me. As cool as Doris is, she doesn't need or want to know about my bum. Doris - if you read that, my humblest apologies.